I just wish!

Saturday, September 19, 2015 0 Comments

What would I do, If I had not known you?

Where would I be, if I had not known you?

Would I be alive, if I had not known you?

Even if I’m, would I be sane, if I had not known you?

Lot’s of existential questions. Answers do not look definitive.  

In a world filled with people who love others for the sake of society, for the sake of using others, for the sake of having a boyfriend or girlfriend to dump their emotional baggage, for the sake of having someone to let their world revolve around, for the sake of getting talktime credited(seriously, it happens),  How did I even find you? I’m still astonished by how much the universe pushed me to talk to you. You know this all too well. I’m not a talker. Not definitely to stranger’s from the fairer sex. Though we have never met in person,  I could say I’m not a stranger to you. I also hope you would say the same!

People say, love happens with reasons and expectations. It might be the case. But I would say, it might or might not overcome the regular idea of love and become something unconditional.(Love in it’s true sense is unconditional, but seriously who cares, we are all busy labeling things, emotions and ideas). It’s only when we don’t know what to label "this", When something has crossed the requirements of being labeled, and still stays close to heart, it is love in the true sense. I’m the guy who stays in his head a lot. There have been more times I have banged myself on someone or some pole, than the number of days I have existed in this planet. I seriously don’t know If it's a figment of my imagination or otherwise. I am seriously at a loss when it comes to understanding what others feel. It becomes overwhelming that it takes a lot of time to understand things as simple as sarcasm (not to term sarcasm as simple, but getting that becomes difficult when being under the influence of emotions). And because i have mentioned being in love, people will start questioning about my girlfriend. What society expects one to!

There have been times when I have considered myself as the knight in shining whatever. The intention was to stay by your side. Not to visit you on a imaginary horse and save you from this wretched environment. You are a strong woman. I admire you.  You need no saving. You are the one who saves others. All you need is someone to hold you still. Hope time will let me do that! 

There have been times when I hurt you. Times when you needed support and I let you down. Fights and misunderstandings makes the bond better. It definitely has. I know a lot on what to talk, and what not to. You were there holding my hand, like a strict parent.. letting me learn on you, correcting me. I would be a social illiterate without you. I used to expect to talk to you, not wanting to bother you would stay in my thoughts. I have stopped expecting to talk. Not that I don't want to, But that’s when I learnt that I have started loving you in the true sense. From all that I have learnt, the best is, "everything is ephemeral & This moment is eternity". Someone said, Eternity is not a long long time, it's absence of time. I just wish, we could fall in each others arms, hold the other still and stay for an eternity. Let this moment last forever... I just wish.!


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